![]() Frodo gets overly het up about his tchotchke and, as a result, carbo loads.Frodo always finds his light, even at the expense of Sam’s:.Frodo saves Sam not necessarily because they’re in love, but because he realises someone has to make the potatoes.Sam would rather almost drown than have Frodo leave him, because he too is a messy queen who loves drama.Frodo wanders into the forest alone, despite there being a lot of orcs after him, because he’s a messy queen who loves drama.Frodo feels no sorrow over the death of Boromir, because Boromir tried to take his tchotchke away from him.Frodo consistently rejects Sam’s attempts to help him, sitting right in the middle of the venn diagram of “toxic masculinity” and “catty homosexuality”. ![]() “I’m here to help you, I promised that old dead queen that I would.” – Samwise Gamgee, slightly paraphrased.Galadriel gives Sam bondage rope, and Frodo glow-in-the-dark vodka, when they leave Lothlorien.Frodo and Sam sit in front of Aragorn on their boat, obviously the gayest of log flume formations.Sam gives Frodo this look, the epitome of gay hurt:.Sam and Frodo go on a hike of undeterminable length with three twinks, two twunks, a bear and an old bearded queen with said tchotchke.Frodo proudly wears a bedazzled toga as armour.After being stabbed by a Nazgul, Frodo hallucinates Arwen into a gown rather than travelling clothes.This is not how you touch your friend’s face:.Frodo puts on gaudy jewellery at the first chance.Both would risk death for second breakfast aka brunch.Both accept the stewardship and guidance of a roving wanderer who happens to look a lot like Viggo Mortensen circa 2001.They let their deadweight stoner twink friends, Merry and Pippin, tag along.“I thought I lost you” followed by this look:.They spy on pretty white ladies wearing wigs.Rather than proceeding hastily with their quest, they often stop to smoke weed and eat meat together.In lieu of dancing with a local girl, Sam prefers “another ale”.Frodo and Sam never have any adventures or do anything unexpected until an older gay man forces them to go on a tchotchke-based quest.And honestly? Not a super functional one! So in the interest of dispelling any uncertainty whatsoever, I’ve watched all three Lord of the Rings films and built up a pretty unimpeachable case as to why Frodo and Sam are definitively, absolutely, a gay couple.
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